Love Reign O'er Me

Hello! I'm a little late tonight so I guess it's actually tomorrow. I just finished watching Reign Over Me. It's a nice, touching movie. It reminds me of the different forms grief takes as it creeps into people's lives. Everyone deals with loss and grief differently and I guess it's important to recognize that. This really hits home because my ba is still coping with the loss of my dada. There are still times, unsurprisingly, when she gets down because she feels the effects of the drastic changes in her life. Most of the time she is able to live out her days fully but there are definitely some moments that can be tough for her. I guess she especially gets lonely whenever there is a holiday or a birthday..times that are the triggers that remind her of time spent with him. Sometimes when my ba is down my mom will try to push her to a better mood. I wonder sometimes about how good that is for her. I do think there should be a limit to how depressed someone gets about things like this but I don't know if enforcing a limit is the right way to go about it. As long as they aren't hurting themselves too badly or hurting others they should be given their freedom. People heal at their own pace and that should be respected.

I was just thinking earlier about education. I really don't like how people take education for granted. It's tempting to complain and feel bad for yourself when you have an endless amount of work to do. It's even understandable, especially when everyone you know isn't in the same situation you are. I think in those moments it is essential to think about how blessed we are to even have the opportunity to obtain an education. We can choose our interests and pursue them at advanced levels of education. That is something that some kids don't even have the means to dream about. It's a shame that so many people either let it go to waste or fail to recognize it as one of the greatest blessings. We have complete access to what it takes to achieve our dreams. When you have chosen a path for yourself--a walk of life on which to make your mark, you have nothing to complain about because you are better off than more than half of the children in this world. When you are in school studying to become what you have dreamt of, you are better off than probably 80% of the children of the world. They don't have the voice to complain and we can't seem to shut up. We hold the key to our future in our hand and yet we are complaining because we don't want to walk over to the door and unlock it. It's pathetic really, when you think about the way we react to having a decade or so of hard work that eventually leads to a six figure salary. What about the people who struggle their entire lives to no good end? Education is something I really feel strongly about as you can probably tell from all of this ranting...I don't know, just something to think about..

Okay this was a serious enough end to a pretty light day! I spent most of the day helping my mom with some paperwork she had to do for work. Literally...I was at the kitchen table for over 7 hours. Ah well, all in the name of family! I'm gonna get to bed now so I can wake up in like 6 hours to watch Saved by the Bell!

A Nice, Lazy Saturday

There's nothing like sleeping in my bed at home home, waking up to a lazy Saturday. I woke up at 12:30 and just sort of lounged around the house since. I did manage to watch a lecture and I'll probably watch one more before quitting for the day.

I spent half an hour just sitting and talking with my ba today. It was a really special time because it's been a while since I've been home and free to do that. I haven't really gotten the chance in a long time and I really miss her when I'm in Philly. I love to sit around with her and joke around and speculate about random things. I am so glad to have her company in my life. She is the purest, most simple and perfect part of my life. I love her so much.

Last night before going to bed I watched Rachel Getting Married. It's an interesting movie. I think Anne Hathaway did a great job in that role. I think it's remarkable how realistic the family's situation was. I mean, I guess most families won't have a heroine addict as a member but the problems and issues that they confront are prevalent in a lot of family settings I think. I especially like the way Kim's guilt was dealt with. I think she had a huge burden to bear and I don't know how many people would have the strength to cope. My attitude towards Rachel changed as I began to understand the complexity of emotions she felt. At first I was amazed and admittedly a bit disgusted at how careless and removed she seemed from Kim's problem but in the scene after the rehearsal dinner I was able to sympathize with her and understand her perspective better. It's interesting that people generally sympathize with the sufferer of a disease but overlook what the family feels. It's typically assumed that the family should care a lot and should take care of the sufferer. While that is a reasonable expectation, years of coping with a sick or handicapped family member can be draining. While I'd like to think I would be strong enough to support someone in my family, the truth is I really don't know. I guess nobody can know until they are put in that position. And I don't think it makes the family any less of a support system or any less loving and caring if they are unable to support. We are all human after all. I don't know..it just makes me sad to think of a disease that tears a family apart and isolates each member. It's not just the sufferer that is isolated in pain and suffering. The family may feel incapacitated and helpless because they can't do anything about the disease or even do anything to make the sufferer feel better. I dunno..the movie just made me think a lot.

Well that's all for today. Gonna go watch a movie with my family.