Break: The Final Chapter

Break is almost over! These days of sleeping in and relaxing all day are coming to an end. I know I didn't appreciate them enough and I'm gonna realize how lucky I was sometime next week, when I'm back to the studying routine and completely not used to it!

Surprisingly being home with the whole family wasn't as frustrating as I was afraid it would be. I'll admit I did spend most of my time with the people I prefer and was pretty good at avoiding the people that would annoy me. But I'm gonna justify that with the potential consequences that were averted!


I'm almost caught up with my friends in Dexter viewing...only 4 episodes left and then I'm done with the biggest task of my break! It's a great show and I'm really glad I started watching. It's an interesting concept and the dialogue is sharp. Also character development is incredible. I mean, REALLY incredible. What's amazing is not only how fully developed and life-like the characters are, but how well their growth is documented. You can watch a character unfold and then once you've gotten to know them, you can track their progress as they change. Relationships between characters evolve as they change and all of it happens so naturally..it really is something that amazes me!

Yesterday was my birthday. I just don't feel it anymore though. I guess after you reach a certain age it's not something that excites you anymore. Not that I'm really old or anything haha..I guess it's lost its appeal because different things excite me these days. It's not a bad thing I think. The one thing I do appreciate is talking to the people that made a difference in my life. It's great because I get to talk to people from all different parts of my life, so it's like reliving all of the positive memories all in a single day.

Tonight I'm spending NYE with the family. This is the first NYE the India family will be here for and I really want to spend time with them. I haven't really done much with them since I've been home so I want to make sure I spend some quality time with them before I go back to school. I've always spent new years with my family...I don't know. It just always seems like the best way to ring in the new year. I guess they're the people I'm the closest to and it seems so impersonal to hang out with anyone else.


I've been reading Salem Falls by Jodi Picoult. I haven't read anything by her yet so this is my first impression of her. It's a good one! I really like the story and how she captivates her audience. There some witchcraft and stuff like that in here...not things I'm usually into. But the way she's written the book, it's really a page-turner. I have a lot of pages left though and only like 2 days to read it all in! Ahhh! Plus I got the ultimate hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. I read the first book sometime last year but I need to read more. I figure I could probably get in one other book before the break is up. Man that's a lot to do: Salem Falls + Hitchhiker's + Dexter + 4 movies that I got with the siblings.

And with that I'm off! Happy NYE! =)

I'm baaack!

I can't believe it's been a month since I last posted. I am really not doing a great job fitting this in with everything else in my life! And it's sad because I do miss writing regularly. I can feel the effects of it on my psyche. I really need to get my act together when I get back to school. I guess that's what break is for--to rejuvenate and reinvigorate.

So I finished my first semester of med school. It seems so strange that such a landmark has already been reached. I feel like I'm still getting used to holding the reins for such an important chapter in my life. By the time I grow accustomed to it and get the hang of it I think it'll be time to move on to rotations. I guess that's just how life works! It seems so strange to think I've already jumped a hurdle. I don't feel accomplished in the least, I really don't. I don't think I've done exceptionally or even made much of a difference in any grand way. I am learning a lot about things that interest me so that's good..but I don't know if any of it is having a lasting effect. It certainly doesn't seem like it. I guess this break is going to be good for me to reenergize. I think towards the end I was getting jaded by it all. I wasn't as excited by life and I wasn't as touched by things as I used to be. It's good to take a hiatus for a little while and reflect. It's what will allow me to continue with the same energy I had going in on day one.

One thing I've realized is that I really need to stay grounded. I need to keep my eyes on my goal obviously but I also need to keep track of the things that matter to me. I need to know what things are important to me and how to incorporate them into my life. I need to take care of my "mental health". I think I've been pretty good about that overall but there are some things that are slipping through the cracks. I think when I go back in January I need to stay focused on the aspects of life that matter most to me. That's what I did when I started med school and as my focus slipped, I started slipping away. I am really motivated to go back and keep myself in the game...in MY game. I have to remember that I set the rules and it's up to ME to play by them.

In lighter news, I've been watching Dexter. I am ADDICTED to it. I am halfway through the second season right now and it is seriously blowing my mind. It makes me think and actually the last few episodes have been making me kinda depressed. Maybe that's why I'm back on this blog..

Break is going well so far. I watched a lot of Dexter and I have been hanging out with my siblings. It's been nice to just relax and not having anything on my mind. Last night we watched Frost/Nixon. It was SO good! I love movies like that and it's been a while since I've seen a good one! Okay time to play Taboo yay!

Thanksgiving

I really love Thanksgiving--it's my favorite holiday. I think it's so important to express gratitude and love to those around you. It's so nice that there is a holiday dedicated to just that. I wish people (including myself) could express their emotions without being prodded to by a specific holiday but I guess this is still better than nothing.

Every year I write out letters to my closest friends expressing the appreciation and love I have for them. I seriously get such a high off of doing that. It's become a ritual and I can't imagine celebrating Thanksgiving without it. It's so important to me to let people know how I feel about them. I think too many things get left unsaid and I strive to say them all.

Break has really been in the spirit of Thanksgiving this year. There was an undertone of appreciation throughout the break. I guess it started with the letter writing on Wednesday night and then getting replies throughout the weekend. I really like being home and with the family. I appreciate the time I spend with them so much because lately I feel like I've been living in a bubble. I honestly think that is what makes med school hard--the isolation that goes along with it. I'm glad I was able to escape from that for a little while at least. It's nice to be able to spend some time with the people that knew me before I became such a 'med student'.

This morning I did some OMM on my grandmother because she was having pain in her upper back. I'm so glad I can use my skills to directly affect the lives of people I care about. It was when I was treating her back that I realized how much being a DO means to me. I know there's the whole MD vs DO debate but honestly it's all about the expression on the person's face after you've helped them. I am so glad that I know OMM. I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't know if I will use it in my practice but I know I will be able to help my parents when they are old and help other people that are close to me. Those are the things that count anyway =)

I don't know what it is but something just feels right. I am really living life with my eyes wide open right now. I have never felt this way before. I always try to be a positive person and keep my optimism high but for the first time, it's effortless. I am loving life right now and I love who I have become. I am working on some things that are important to me and I can see progress. I hope this is something that I've cultivated over time and it won't disappear when life changes. All I know is in this moment I am happy..

Simple Times

Being home for Thanksgiving break right now is reminding me of the simple times. I don't consider my home a 'simple' place right now with so many people staying here. In fact, coming home has made me realize how much simpler my life is than my family's at this point. Sure I'm in med school but the thing is I have absolutely no responsibilities or obligations. Seeing how my parents are drained and still running around makes me feel something in my heart. I think I am living in a simple time compared to them.

It's interesting because just before I left to come home I was talking to one of my friends about how coming home brings us back to simpler times. When I come home and talk to my brother about high school I realize that I miss when life was that simple. When the biggest concern was becoming an executive board member of a club because "that would look good on college apps". I miss having life set out in front of me as a blank book that I could fill however I want. I miss being able to color outside the lines and getting only a tap on the wrist. I miss the times before I grew up. I don't even think my life is hectic right now but my mind has matured since those days. Most of the time it's a good thing but sometimes I wish I could go back to being as silly and careless as I was back then. I miss the innocence that goes along with being ignorant.

I guess that's why I make it a point to stay a kid in so many ways. I get loud when I am excited or happy and I will say what is on my mind without too much inhibition. I am an open book when it comes to expressing my feelings and thoughts (I guess the fact that I'm typing this out on a blog says all!). I can see the things growing up has done to my parents and in some ways I hope I never grow up. I'd rather get in trouble and deal with the consequences of being too "naive/innocent/childish" than be an adult that can't feel the same level of amazement and appreciation for the simple things.

For me, being in a simple time is about where your mind is. It's about how life can throw anything your way but you can still maintain a sunny outlook. You can break down the complex things and see the simple things for what they are...beautiful.

Reflections on School

When I stop and think about it I realize I am truly happy. I rarely get aggravated or upset. I'm never short-tempered. Nothing is really standing in my way right now. I can't remember the last time I felt down or disheartened. I am really at a point in my life where I understand my goals and responsibilities and I am working hard to achieve them. I am surrounded by good hearts and I am always connected to those that are further away. I can't remember ever feeling so at peace with life. It's odd...who would've thought this zen state would come during med school?!

I finished my 3 exams on Monday. Hopefully they went well. I know I worked hard and more importantly, I have figured out a way to work harder and do even better. My goals are set high and I don't see myself lowering them. I really like the stuff I'm learning about...even when I don't. I realize that seems like a paradox but what I mean is even the most uninteresting topics seem relevant in some way. The specialties I am not even considering still have applicability in whatever I end up doing and either way all of the material is enriching my knowledge. I can't say I'll retain most of it, but while I am learning it I am fascinated by it. Now if only I didn't get tested on it ;)

Anatomy lab is drawing to a close. We finished the limbs and we have moved on to dissecting the head. It is the most personal experience of lab. I think it's moving to look at our cadaver's face and think of how once upon a time that mouth was smiling and that nose was breathing and those eyes were seeing the world. It's an interesting experience to look at the cadaver and see it with a newly infused sense of life. I haven't really thought of it in this way since the first lab. The human aspect disappears when you're elbow deep in cadaver juice. But working on the face brought that back to the surface and I feel a connection with the cadaver. We found out that our cadaver actually had lung cancer and the cause of death was a cerebrovascular accident, or a stroke. That made me think because my first encounter with medicine was actually my grandfather's stroke back when I was in elementary/middle school. It was an emotional experience, finding out about the cadaver's cause of death and age. I think it really makes me appreciate life and how perfectly orchestrated everything really is. It's a beautiful thing.

Growing up

It's been a nice relaxing week. I think I let the calm of the storm (storm=impending exams) precede the torrents (torrents=completely unproductive stressful moments). I had a nice weekend--spent it hanging out with my friends and just relaxing. This week has got to be really productive though...3 exams on monday!I made a study schedule and I'm only one day behind (it started 1 day ago haha) but whatever....if I stay only one day behind I should be able to do pretty well!

Yesterday I was studying at Starbucks and a group of high schoolers walked in. The first thing I felt: old. I cannot believe how it feels like it was forever ago that I was so naive and excitable. I remember when I used to be like them and I can't get over how far removed I am from that state of mind. I grew up and I don't know when/how it happened! It was really something to see them sitting there and hanging out, obsessing over such stupid things. In some ways I miss being like that. I miss having little to do or care about in the world. I miss living in a bubble with my friends and getting worked up over such insignificant things. But there's some benefit to growth and as much as I miss those days, I would never go back. There's a new level of meaning in my life now. There's maturity and insight I gained that I wouldn't give up for the easy life.


Life is good =)

Marathon

Ahh these posts are so spread apart. I miss writing more regularly. I wish I could spend more time doing the things that matter most to me. I think I have to get better organized in life. There's a lot going on and I don't think I'm as organized as I ought to be in dealing with all of my responsibilities. And so then I end up being inefficient with how I spend my time and I end up neglecting things that matter. Note to self: get better at life!


So on Sunday I volunteered at the medical tents of the NYC marathon. It was an amazing experience. I am so glad I did it and I can't wait to do it again next year. I think the clinical exposure I got by working there was incredible. I saw how they managed a high volume of patients with limited resources. I even got the chance to disconnect IVs from the patients' arms. I spent half of the time working inside the acute care area of the tent, mainly taking vitals (and disconnecting IVs a couple of times!) I spent the rest of the time working at the finish line. I was scanning the crowd after they crossed to see if they needed to visit the medical tent or if they needed salt to ease their cramps. I felt like I was a part of something a lot larger than me and it was mindboggling. I even got to see the first place winners run through the finish line! I think overall it was a great experience, both medically and just in general. One of the things I noticed and was extremely moved by was the fact that the runners would always ask me my name when I helped them. They would ask me my name and then address me by it when they would thank me. It was amazing how touched they were by what little I did for them. I mean they were never going to see me again...who cares what my name is. But most of them did stop to ask and call me by it. That made my heart smile =)

Clearly after volunteering at the marathon I added a new life goal. I'm going to do a marathon one day! Seeing all of those people accomplish such an amazing feat really inspired me. One of the biggest motivators was just looking at the assortment of people running this thing. There were people who were not star athletes, people who were old, people who weren't exactly fit. If they could do it I don't have any excuse. Someday I will run (or walk haha) a marathon!

Okay that was a great break. Now on to more academic things...more later =)

Rainy day blues

OH mann what a week! I have 2 exams coming up on Monday and I have been so busy cramming all week. Sadly the end is not even in sight yet. I feel like there is so much studying left to do and I'm getting through it so slowly and unproductively. I really hope I get my head on straight and get it all crammed into my head.

There were a couple of good things this week though:
1. I'm the vice president of my class! I ran unopposed so it's not that impressive but I think I'm awesome enough to have won anyway ;)

2. After studying at school one day I happened to leave at a perfect time to reach the beach for sunset. I watched the sun set over the water and it was such a soulful experience. I really needed that to unwind after a hectic time so it was absolutely perfect.

Yeah so that's it for the good news haha. It's a tough time in life right now. I feel overwhelmed by the work. I know I can handle it..I just made some bad judgments in the beginning of this module and I'm really paying for them now. I know I can NEVER cram like this again. I really have to stay on top of my work and keep my focus strong, especially now that I have so much more on my plate (I am, in effect, sharing plates with Joe Biden!).

I don't have time for more now but I just wanted to take a break from studying and post. More after the exam!

New Year

Today is the first day of the new year according to the Hindu calendar. I wasn't able to go home for Diwali because of the amount of studying I need to do, but I am still able to celebrate it while I'm at school by keeping the spirit alive in my heart. I know it sounds corny but I don't know how to describe it without sounding like a Hallmark card..

So some good news--I honored the Intro module! Top 10% Babyyyyy! I was very excited when I found out and I got that boost I needed to sustain my motivation. All the effort is not going to waste! Well not that it would be going to waste considering I will be needing all of this information pretty much forever. But yeah, the gratification is cool haha!


Yesterday I went to see Where the Wild Things Are. It was a really good movie. It was a lot more serious than I thought it would be, definitely above the heads of all the cutie-pies in the theater. There was a lot of symbolism and metaphorical content that really made me appreciate the movie. I thought it was beautifully done. I especially liked the handling of the camera--some of the camera angles during certain scenes really set a mood or atmosphere for the movie. It was deep and thought-provoking. I really liked it and now I wanna reread the book haha..

I did a lot of reflecting and thinking yesterday. I think because it's Diwali and an opportunity to turn over a new leaf I had to be my normal self and overthink things haha. I did some writing to get some clarity and clarity was attained. I feel like I am refreshed mentally and emotionally and I am ready to face whatever challenges come my way this year. You hear that world? BRING IT!

Fresh Start to the Week

This is going to be a short week! I'm loving it. Starts on a Tuesday and ends Friday at noon. What more could I ask for!

I had such a relaxing weekend...I am back at school and ready to study! I think this past weekend was the perfect balance of work and play and this is what I should strive for every time I go home. I end up coming back completely refreshed and not completely behind. It's seriously perfect! Guess I found my new goal in life haha..

Last night I played darts and then watched Eurotrip with a couple of friends. It was really relaxing and I'm glad I had the time to do it. I found out that I'm pretty good at darts (it was my first time playing). It's not like I have any inherent talent at it, but I've got the hand-eye coordination and I can adjust precisely based on the previous throw. That counts for something I guess!

Driving back to LI yesterday was wonderful. I really like long drives (long can be anything more than 15 minutes in my book). There wasn't any traffic since it was Columbus day and I reached here in good time. I just love the feeling of driving down an open road. I love the metaphorical significance of it and I guess I'm corny because that's what I think of when I drive. Another reason I enjoy the drive back so much is because I've only made it once or twice before. It's still relatively new to me so my mind is still engaged. It's not a drive that I'm completely familiar with so there's still a little bit of excitement.

Alright time to get to that work I'm so pumped for! Later days =)

Friendships

It's amazing how you can lose touch with someone but if the relationship was a close one in the first place, how easy it is to rekindle. As you dig deeper with the person you realize how much you had in the first place. The time and distance traveled alone really attaches a value to the things you shared. You realize their worth and you realize how life would never be the same without them. Every person that enters our lives really does change us in some way. Sometimes it's a small change that can be overlooked or not even attributed properly. But sometimes that person changes your entire outlook on life. Those are the people that shape us and allow us to define who we are. Those are the people we should never let go.

Nice Weekend Morning

Amazing moment in history yesterday: Matt Nathanson was on the radio! I was driving home for the weekend and I was listening to the radio and Matt Nathanson played! It was amazing. I just hope this isn't the point where he sells himself out. He's such a talented musician and he has a lot of heart in his music. I would hate for this to ruin that human touch he puts into all of his songs.

Every time I come home for the weekend it reminds me of how important it is to keep my inner peace intact. I guess my home is still the perfect place to get that peace snatched away from you. There's so many people, so many toes being stepped on, so many egos to protect. Every time my parents vent to me about what they put up with all I can think is: Find the happiness you are seeking within. I know it's obviously a lot easier for me to see that being so removed from the situation, but I really hope they can find that within themselves. It would make this stressful time in life a lot easier for them. They are putting up with a lot of pressures and they are tolerating a lot of things and it's no wonder that they get disheartened. I'm amazed at my dad's control and will power. He gets so frustrated with so many things that these relatives do but he is always able to control his tongue around them. I don't think he's ever said anything out of line randomly at them out of frustration. I admire that and I hope to be that strong in my life.

School's going really well. Right now I am on the fence in terms of honoring and passing. I may have honored the Intro course but I don't know yet because the lab grades haven't been factored in. It's not that serious but I really hope I did because that would be the perfect start to med school! If I didn't it's okay since I'm gonna be working harder next course anyway ;)

Today I'm gonna do a bunch of work because I slacked off last week (gimme a break, it was the end of a module!) and I'm gonna watch a movie with my brother. I think he still hasn't seen the hangover so we'll watch that. I'm excited...I haven't seen it since the screening in Philly! Man, I miss Philly. I think I'll always consider Philly my city. I know I went through this thought process before leaving Philly but there's a part of my heart that seriously goes out to Philly. I had no clue it would be like that when I was living there!

21 guns--Greenday

This is an amazing song. I think it is so complex, with multiple levels of meaning and interpretations. I see it as a protest against war, specifically Iraq. I think Green Day is expressing grief over the meaningless loss of lives in this effort. The necessity for this war is questionable and the rationale is porous. This flawed attempt at bringing peace and democracy to a people has had a huge toll and the song deals with the concept of weighing the costs and the benefits. Whether or not the entire effort seems heroic or romantic means nothing to the family of the fallen soldier.

Another interpretation of the song would be seeing it as a breakup. When an important person leaves your life it is a drastic change. Even if it is for the best in the long run, there is an immediate misery attached to a breakup. I think the feelings addressed in this song when applied to the breakup situation are extremely powerful and thought-provoking. The idea of the mind breaking the spirit of the soul is absolutely stunning. The stanza about burning down the house and the home to live on your own is another touching one. I think it's amazing how well the lyrics depict the trouble of starting off with a clean slate. When you have to remove a person from your life there are a lot of strings that must be severed. That person has a connection to so many aspects of your life and every aspect that was touched is changed in some way after the breakup. Things that seem meaningless and so removed from the person actually end up being an unexpected source of memories. And so to purge your life of that person, you end up destroying most of what you have. That is such a haunting concept.

Hope

More than anything, the world needs hope right now. Hope is one of the greatest treasures we have in our possession. We have the power to change an entire situation based on our perspective. The way we see things can shape the outcome of things in our lives. The best things happen to those who have a positive outlook; the ones who rise to the top are those that believe in their abilities and their ambitions. So let go of your doubts, hope for the best, and soar like only you can. How long are you going to keep the world waiting?

Beautiful morning

It didn't look like it would be, but it's a beautiful morning. The sun is shining brightly and the air is crisp. It's the kind of morning you see in the movies, complete with freshly squeezed orange juice and some peaches from the tree out back. Mornings like these make life worth living. There is NOTHING as calming and peaceful as the birth of a new day. As I drove to school this morning I noticed the sunlight coming down in rays between the leaves of the trees. There was a slight breeze that came in through the open windows of my car. It was a beautiful drive in. I need to appreciate things like this more. It is really these moments that define our lives and we are free to close our eyes or open them in all directions at the same time (dcfc).

Mellow Yellow

So I've really gotten used to the whole swing of things. It amazes me how quickly I am able to adjust to a new environment, to a new lifestyle. And not just me--people in general. It doesn't take us very long to get used to doing something different in an entirely different place. Within a few weeks, we can redefine our entire lives and feel as though we had always been living this way. That's the point I'm at now.

Exams come and go (but they seem to come with a lot more intensity than they go with). I'm used to studying all the time and I'm doing well in my classes. My grades are pretty much where I want them to be. I have 3 major exam coming up Monday and I really need to work hard on those to honor this course. I know I can do it if I stick to my study plan for the weekend. We'll see how that goes!

I think friendship is seriously a big thing in med school. Without good, dependable friends to lean on it would be very difficult to get through all of the workload and stress in one piece. I'm glad I get along with my roommates and I have some awesome people to study with for the labs and stuff. It's really a good feeling knowing I'm not alone in this struggle. It's nice that there are people here that are hard-working and dedicated and just in it for the right reasons!

I've found that change comes a lot easier when you don't welcome it with a cold shoulder. Embracing change is really a big lesson that I learned here. Can't say that I won't be apprehensive again, but I definitely realize that I shouldn't be. As you can probably tell from this post, life is good =)

Post-exam relief!

Good morning! It really is...I got to sleep in today. Yesterday was my exam, I think it went well! And then last night I went out with some friends and had a nice time getting to know people. And then I came back to my place where there were a bunch of people over, dancing and playing beer pong. Didn't get to sleep until around 2:30 but that's not a problem when I don't have class until 1 =)

Yesterday we had our white coat ceremony in the afternoon. SO boring! I can't believe I had to sit through that. And what made is worse was the fiasco with trying to find my car in the parking lot afterwards. I walked around the entire campus trying to see where my car was! It was RIDICULOUS. I was so tired by then end of that. My feet still hurt today!

I went shopping yesterday after the exam and finally bought a belt! (yay weight loss haha) It was long overdue and I'm so glad that I don't have to worry about pulling my pants up all the time now. Ah relief comes in so many forms!

So I read an interesting article on NYTimes. It was an insight on T.R. Reid's book about his stiff shoulder injury and seeing how it would be treated in 10 different countries of the world. It seems especially interesting because he is well-versed in health policy, so his comments and opinions would be educated and well-supported. He used to be a foreign correspondent for the Washington Post so he's had plenty of overseas exposure. If I had more time to read leisurely right now I would definitely want to pick that up. It seems like my kind of book! Oh well, that's what Thanksgiving break is for =)

So the kids from India started school last week. They like it so far, but I'm wondering how much they really understand. They say they understand when the teacher talks and everything. Hopefully that's true. Either way, I gave my brother a nice long lecture about being a big brother. Since he was always the youngest he never really had to watch over anyone or teach anyone anything so it's interesting to see that develop in him.


US OPEN! Ah! I actually didn't get to watch the finals because I had the stupid white coat ceremony but I did watch the Federer-Djokovic semi-finals. If the finals was anything like that it'll be an intense match to watch! I was so sad that Federer lost. I really respect Federer's game. I think he has so much talent and from his interviews and on-court behavior, he really seems like a nice guy. I don't sense too much of an ego, and for someone at that level to remain humble and modest, that's really something. And just from the way he plays---you can tell he LOVES the game. I think it's a beautiful thing, watching him play. It sucks that he lost yesterday but I still love him =)

And finally! STEPHEN COLBERT IS BACK =D Alright now it's time to get ready for school (I love that I'm typing this at 11 am hahaha)

In Your Wedding Dress--Matt Nathanson

I just listened to this song last night and it really made me think. I can't believe how beautifully sad it is. The emotions in this song are so incredible. My interpretation is a guy who is about to get married to a girl he doesn't want to commit to. It may not even be the girl he wants to push away, but the commitment itself. "Even at my best, I want to let go."

There is something very universal about this song. Knowing that there is something you should be doing but being so afraid to do it, even though it's what's "right". Our individuality is such a frail thing and to commit to someone in any way requires surrendering that individuality to some extent. You lose yourself in a relationship while you are trying to find the connection with the other person. I think the best relationships are the ones where there is something deep connecting the two that somehow that brings both of the people involved to a deeper understanding of themselves. I think finding a new dimension of yourself is an important aspect of being in a serious relationship.

Matt Nathanson is really an amazing musician. I am so impressed by the complexity of this song and how beautifully it was written and performed. It breaks my heart to hear him sing this...it really is a touching song.

Routine

So it's been a while since I posted and now I'm officially 'used to' med school. If you ask me how things are, I can really answer "oh you know, the usual".

I've already had one major exam and one major quiz along with lots of smaller quizzes. We have at least 2 graded things each week, so things generally stay pretty busy. I mean, they would either way but now they're busy with a sense of urgency.

My favorite subject right now is definitely anatomy. I like the gross anatomy lab aspect of it and even just the subject itself. I love seeing things that are COMPLETELY relevant to body function on a grand scale. It's exciting to see the things I have been studying about for so many years. And I LOVE dissecting. I love using the scalpel and scissors and oh man if you throw a probe or forceps into the mix I am in heaven! Haha no but I really do enjoy it!

I am definitely getting used to the whole studying all the time routine. I definitely take my breaks and slack off when I need to. But overall I haven't really fallen behind at all and I'm able to keep up fairly easily. I can't ever take an entire day off though, or that would REALLY screw me up haha. It seems like it's so impossible to play catch up with the volume of information they are throwing at us. I don't know how I would manage if I didn't go to class everyday and do the designated work that evening. It would definitely be tougher!

I've met some people who seem nice..made a few study groups and study buddies. I am liking the whole group study thing because I find that it really helps me learn the material when I am able to explain it to someone else.

Alright well that's enough of an update! Back to studying for Monday's exam!

Remember me?!

Once again, I contemplated giving this up haha. Things get so hectic and it's hard to squeeze in time for everything I want to do! Sooo after a whole 21 years of anticipation, I'M AT MEDICAL SCHOOL! It's awesome to finally be where I've been wanting to be for so long!

I'm really liking it here. The area is beautiful and the campus is very pretty. There are a lot of trees and a lake and A LOT OF TREES! Near my apartment there's the beach and it's all residential so it's a nice area to live in. I have class generally the entire day from 9-5. We get a lunch break from 12-1 so that's usually nice (obviously to get some studying in haha!) We have a major exam coming up Monday (come to think of it, I'm probably typing this now so I can avoid studying for it..oh well)

(ahh why is there candy corn in that picture?! I don't even like candy corn!)
So news in my life...I WENT TO SEE THE COLBERT REPORT TAPING!!! It was AMAZING! Seriously, one of the best experiences of my life! He was so nice and funny and charming. There is something so amazing about him. I don't know. All I know is I'm obsessed. He shook my hand and gave me a high five. The entire taping I wasn't able to pay attention to the stuff he was saying; I was just distracted by staring at his face. I'd laugh when other people laughed. The interview the day I went was Ang Lee. He seemed like a nice guy! Overall it was a GREAT experience! I hope I get the chance to go again at some point in the future but I'm so grateful that I was able to go once!!

So, being at medical school has triggered a lot of reform ideas in my mind. The system has its flaws and I hope when I am in academic medicine I am able to help fix it, at least a little. I find that some of the professors (and I think this is a universal thing) are still testing us as if we are undergrads. The stupid rote memorization of meaningless facts that we're going to forget an hour after the exam is not the path to becoming a great physician. A good one maybe but not great. I think the very thing that defines brilliance in the field is thinking analytically. The doctors that amaze me are the ones who can connect seemingly unrelated ideas or symptoms and get a cohesive picture out of it. I think those are the skills we should be learning right now, not necessarily every enzyme in some pathway. I guess I've always been a conceptual learner and the memorization bit seems to be getting old after so many years. And what's funny is that most professors will even say that we need to think about the big picture and see things in perspective, and yet they will test us on the details! It doesn't make sense! I think that's an issue that I really want to have changed and when it's in my hands, I will do something about it.

The coolest thing about medical school is anatomy. We have started dissecting and we've already gotten to the point where we take out the lungs and heart. It's pretty cool. And I learned that I am ambidextrous when it comes to using a scalpel! I like to learn anatomy (even outside the gross gross lab) because it just makes sense. You can see the function of the things you are memorizing and it all comes together when you think about the human body's needs. I find it interesting and plus, it's just SO much fun dissecting haha!

Actually I've found that a lot in my reaction to things--I really like when things all fit in together nicely. When we're taught things that make sense in a larger scale it's always satisfying. I don't think I dislike any subject just because the way it's taught, it's all relevant. We're not being lectured on things that won't affect us AT ALL. I mean granted this education isn't gonna get me far as a doctor, but at least the things we are learning about will be encountered by one of the student doctors in my class. So it's all relevant to some extent. Even the most obscure things don't seem like a waste of time, just because at some point in someone's life, that one obscure thing may be everything.

One of my strongest motivations to study right now is the idea of future patients. Everything I am learning is not about the grades or about me. It won't matter what specialty I go into because I will be touching people's lives no matter what. I want to learn as much as possible because someday people are going to be putting their lives in my hands. I need to be prepared to deal with that responsibility and so I am not okay with just passing. I just want to try my hardest to do the best I possibly can and not settle for less because 'it's still passing'. There's a higher responsibility right now and the focus has shifted away from me.

It's weird being away from home with so many people living there. Whenever I call home I usually only talk to my mom or my siblings. It's not often that I talk to any of the other relatives. But last night when I called my aunt really wanted to talk to me. It's so nice to remember that I have such a huge support system at home. It's easy to forget that when I'm caught up in the day to day activities here but I have to make it a point to remember.


My sister leaves for college on Sunday! I can't believe she's already going! It's kinda crazy to think of how old I am--in terms of age, education, place in life. It's nice that I'm able to give her some advice on things I learned along the way. Hopefully she can learn things an easier way because of that. I know we all have our own burdens to carry and obstacles to overcome but it's nice when we're able to help each other out along the way. I know she will be fine and hopefully she knows it too! I remember when I left home for the first time...the anticipation seriously sucked more than anything. Once I was at school and made friends, within a week I was happy where I was. But man, the days leading up to the big move can be so tough! I guess it's all part of the learning process.

Speaking of learning process, it's been great posting again and I think I'm gonna stick to doing it as a release. It's nice to be able to reflect and write out how I feel about things. Especially because the people I've become friends with here still don't know me as well and there's things that I wouldn't tell them yet. So it's nice to have this outlet and I'm regretting not having considered it in the past two weeks! Ah well, time to get back to my studying! Carpe diem =)

Hello Again!

It's been a while since I've posted. I was contemplating giving up this blogging idea but I guess I'm not going to, considering I'm writing this right now. I leave for med school in 2 days so now things are getting to be hectic. There's a lot of random stuff left to get and it's hard to get around to it because there's always something to take care of with all the India family.

It's crazy how fast this summer went by. I think I can describe my entire summer in two words: family and (and doesn't count as one of the words...and neither does any of this stuff within parenthesis) religion. Those are the only two areas where I put any effort ALL summer. I'm wondering how things are gonna play out on both fronts when I move to New York.

I can already see that my family is going to miss me. They make any excuse they can to help me with packing and shopping and getting things organized. And the kids will just come to my room for no reason, just to talk. It's really sweet. I don't think I'll miss the hectic-ness but I will definitely miss having the kids to talk to and hang out with.

Also, my ba. I miss living with her and while it's been nice over the summer, things have been different in some ways. Her personality has changed because she has taken on the responsibility of helping raise her grandkids. She is a lot more stressed and tired and also the overall tensions that arise between family members is a huge burden on her. I really hope she finds peace in all of this. It's kind of sad because she had just gotten back to her old self after my grandfather passed away. She was just getting used to living life and enjoying it and now all of this is thrown into the picture. I guess we all have our burdens to bear..

I'm not too nervous about going to medical school mainly because the grad program I was in gave me a good taste of what medical school entails. Academically, I sort of know what to expect so I'm not very anxious about handling the classwork and studying. It's just gonna be weird to start all over in a new place. I guess it's like taking a step back in time and going to undergrad all over again--new city, new apartment, new friends. It's all a bit strange to have to go through it all over again!

So remember how reading was a major goal for the summer?? I should have been a little more specific in my diction. I read a lot, but I don't know if I finished enough books. I started a bunch of novels so my overall pages read isn't too shabby. But I don't know how anything ends! I went to the library today to drop some books off and I was SO tempted to get a new book but it's really not worth it. I'm not gonna get much reading done in the next two days!

I think one of my major regrets this summer is that I wasn't able to spend enough quality time with my siblings. We've all been busy with our own things this summer and the free time we do have, it's generally spent with each other, plus 5 or so other people. I wish the timing of things could've been different so the last summer at home for my sister and me didn't coincide with my relatives coming from India. But I guess it's about making the best of any situation and I think I was able to do that pretty well.

I've been thinking about friends a lot lately...It's weird how easily people can slip out of my life if I don't make the effort. I haven't been too good this summer cuz of all the busyness at home. And I don't think med school is gonna make it any easier so I'm just gonna have to balance it all out. Ah well, we live and we learn!

To leave off, my friend's REALLY cute kittens:

I'm Good at Frisbee Starting Yesterday!

I went to the park with the family yesterday. We packed our dinner and drove 15 mins to a waterfront park in a neighboring town. It was a lot of fun! We played spud and we ate and then after dinner we threw around frisbees. AND I WAS GOOD!!! (I have NEVER been good at frisbee tossing and all of a sudden I was!) Ah, good times!

I drove to the library so many times today..it's kinda weird. I had to return some stuff that was due yesterday so I had to get there before they opened. Therefore, trip # 1 at 8 am. THEN I had to go back to take out the exact books I returned because me and my sister hadn't finished reading them. Hence, trip # 2 sometime later. Then I had to go to the park to pick up my brother and since the park is right across the street from the library, I stopped by to return the movie that was watched just before I left. That's a grand total of 3 trips to the library!

Speaking of reading, I am still working on Corelli's Mandolin. I really need to get some more reading in or I'll never finish! It is taking me forever because I keep doing other things around the house. And it doesn't help that my sister spends her days with her door locked so nobody even bothers to ask her for anything anymore. Everyone automatically comes to me with any question, complaint, or observation. Really, it gets quite annoying.


I just watched About a Boy with my siblings. They haven't seen it and I love it so it makes for a perfect night! That movie is really incredible though. I don't think a better part can be conceived for Hugh Grant. He plays the role extremely well and I find that watching it again and still believing the character underscores how naturally he fits the role. Simply amazing (and irresistible)! I think the story is such a beautiful one. No matter how many times it has been recreated, it is touching and heartwarming and really makes me think. I may get annoyed of the family but it's still a blessing to have company. I should really appreciate the positive more than I accentuate the negative.

Alright well that's about it for now! Time for bed =)

Catch-up on a hectic week

Wow! Definitely thought not having a job would amount to a lot more posts! Sorry for the long absence..I have been creating a makeshift job for myself. I am currently a 7th grade, 8th grade, 9th grade, and 10th grade teacher! I am trying to help my cousins adjust to speaking English the American way...I make them watch movies, read aloud, do grammar drills, and write essays. (When I write it out like that it really seems like a lot of work haha..It's for their own good! I'm not being mean or bossy I swear!)

Mornings and evenings have been spent going to prayer and in between the two is when school is in session. The good thing is I'm getting used to having all these people around. I can tolerate the noise a lot better and the tolerance factor is definitely increasing. I played volleyball and cards and board games with the kids in the past week.

I think one good thing that comes out of all this is that my brother and sister are maturing. They weren't immature (at least not more than the average kid anyway) but they definitely had some growing up to do. I'm glad they're learning from having all these kids around. Now that's taking 'taste of your own medicine' to an entirely different (cruel and unusual?) level!

Our lawn mowing people that we hired ditched us. Our lawn is too much for them so they don't wanna do it anymore. So two days ago, I mowed most of the lawn and my uncles helped too. But then when we refilled the oil we put the wrong kind so the lawnmower got mad at us. Now there's a randomly located square patch of grass that hasn't been mowed. Oh well! Maybe I should've tried this with the lawn mowers:


My exercise lately has been a lot of sports. We put up the volleyball net for my sister's backyard graduation party so it's been up since. I play volleyball and badminton and soccer (who knew a volleyball net can be a soccer goal too?!) It's been a lot of fun. That's one of the benefits of having so many kids around...we can actually play team sports!

I've found that getting well adjusted to having so many people around is making life a lot better. I actually look forward to playing with the kids and helping the adults in the kitchen. I make jokes and I talk to them about anything on their minds. It's nice to have the company and I know I will miss it when I am buried in books in a month.

Oh so on the med school front...one of my roommates has decided to withdraw because she got accepted to another school. So now we are on the hunt again for a roommate. I'm not too concerned though cuz financially I wouldn't be responsible for her portion (I hope?)

Well now I'm gonna get some reading done (still workin on corelli's mandolin)..I haven't had enough time for myself lately so I need to take advantage when I get it!

My Glass is Optimistic

Ah so I have some good news that can also be considered bad news (half full or half empty kind of situation..Okay I have to say the thought that I'm tempted to say: Democrats think the glass is half full and Republicans think the glass is theirs hahah) Okay and now a funny, semi-relevant picture:


Okay so back to my news. I don't have a summer job anymore. The company I was working for realized that they aren't as understaffed as they thought and they don't need my help as much as they thought sooo I "can spend some time with my family before I go off to medical school".

I don't blame them for not keeping me...I mean I did have enough time to read two entire books all during work. I just wish they thought it through before hiring me because it's gonna be hard to find a job for a month now. I could've had a summer long project but one month is tough. I'm gonna start looking today though. I don't really care if it's a job or a voluntary type of thing but I just need to be doing something. I can't sit around the house all day with nothing to do. So here's to my search!

Today my brother started his internship at the state assemblyman's office. It's kinda weird seeing him grow up so fast. I can't believe he's already interning at places! I think having these India kids here really makes me see my siblings in a different light. How mature and grown up they are really strikes me when I have a bunch of preteens to compare them to. I think there is a difference in maturity in kids that grow up here and kids that grow up there. In some ways, my cousins are more mature than my siblings. They always know to help out with everything and they can understand a life of struggle better than we can. But in terms of decorum and emotional maturity, there's a huge discrepancy. Now on the decorum front, I completely understand that they don't subscribe to the same societal rules that we do so it's unreasonable to expect them to get the hang of that right away. But the emotional maturity---that one puzzles me. There are points when the 15 year old is fighting with the 6 year old and I'm standing there wondering which girl is which age. There are certain things you can tell those kids a thousand times and they will still never get the hang of it. They aren't as open-minded as kids here and I think that's gonna make it tough for them to adjust to life here. They have a huge transition to make and the more open they keep their minds, the easier it will be for them. I hope they are able to see that soon and able to make the necessary changes. Ah well, I guess whatever fate has in store for them..

Time for breakfast! More later (since I don't have a job or anything haha)

Refreshed!

Things are getting better at home. I am getting used to having all of these people here and I am able to tolerate them a lot better now. It's still loud and sometimes it can get frustrating. I don't think anything external has changed, but I have made a lot of internal improvements. I don't actively get mad at them anymore and I don't get annoyed by the little things anymore. It's a lot better now that I don't concern myself with every thing that goes on in the house. I only butt into things that affect me and the rest of it...I couldn't care less (hate when that phrase is used wrong haha)

Not much going on in life in terms of interesting stories. I go to prayer in the morning, go to work, come home, go to prayer in the evening, eat dinner, and then come home and hang out for an hour or so before I can't keep my eyes open any longer. It's a pretty straightforward routine with barely any curveballs. I have figured out that I can hang out with my brother and sister at night before I go to bed. That's pretty much the only time I have to spend with them since I'm not home during the day. And the best part about that time is that it's just us, not the other gazillion kids too. I really am glad I have that opportunity.


Also, I started reading Corelli's Mandolin. I REALLY like it so far. I forget how far in I am (it's been a hectic weekend) but the book is so interesting. I don't know how he does it but the author is able to include some of his more philosophical thoughts within the context of a fiction book. It's also very funny. The man is brilliant! More when I read more =)


Oh and I'm listening to Blink. I decided to try out the audiobook medium since I've never really done that and I have a long ride to work. It was kinda hard to keep paying attention at first. A whole track would go by and I'd realize I wasn't REALLY listening so I'd have to replay it. But I got the hang of it. I think it's a better alternative to the radio which, after a few days, REALLY gets redundant. Plus it doesn't help that I'm not a fan of that Pitbull song that every radio station has the urge to play, every 20 MINUTES!! Blink is an interesting book though. It's about the snap judgments we are able to make without our conscious processes even being aware of them. It's interesting because the 'sources' he uses are a marriage counselor who within a minute or so of witnessing interactions between a couple can predict the fate of their relationship, a car dealer who has met immense success in his line of work, paleontologists (that's probably not the right word but whatever) that can tell when an artifact is a fake in just a glance, and the like. It's an interesting concept and the different mediums presented are varied enough to keep it interesting.
Alright I'm really getting tired now. I'll write some more whenever I next get the chance!

Hecticity

Ah a lot happened in the past few days..It's been a hectic week for my family. Two days ago (Thursday) I got into a car accident..nothing too serious but my car needs some major repairs. I was slowing down with traffic and the car behind me wanted to switch lanes but she wasn't keeping an eye on what I was doing, just on the lane to the right. So she rammed into the back of my car. I was driving an SUV and she had a small Volkswagon so her car pretty much went under the back of mine. My exhaust pipe is bent and smushed up and the rear passenger side light doesn't work. And the tire may be misaligned. So that car is pretty much not safe to drive right now.

Oh and the first thing the tow truck guy says to me...."Are you a fan of Michael Jackson? He just died." Uhhh, WHAT?! I think I may have been more shocked to hear that than I was when I heard the sound of the car smashing into mine. It's kinda weird to think that he's dead. Like, I'm no huge fan or anything but who doesn't like him, you know! And regardless of any individual opinion, he is definitely an icon, a legend. It is weird when people that represent a certain time or era pass away.

Ah so that was Thursday. And then Friday, my sister had an allergy attack because she may have eaten something with peanuts (the allergy, allegedly). She was having difficulty breathing and so we ended up at the emergency room for a few hours. It wasn't anything too serious but it definitely scared all of us! She is fine now, just exhausted and resting up.

My guru has arrived and I have been going to morning and evening prayers everyday. It makes my day longer and a little more tiring, but it's definitely the most welcome part of my summer. The big program for our religious group is on July 4th, which is next Saturday. So there's a lot to do in the upcoming week!


Yesterday we had a palkhi, which is a parade of sorts. A palkhi is a platform on which an idol is placed. There are a few wooden stick type things jutting out that are carried on the shoulders of a group of men. (See picture above) We had a bunch of people playing the drums and we were all singing and dancing down the street. It was a lot of fun. I love when we have those because it makes me feel like I'm in India. There is colored powder being thrown and bells jingling and people clapping and dancing and singing. The only clue that we're not in India are the onlookers from the neighboring streets that want to see the festivity. It was a really great time!


Oh and one thing I've neglected to mention..I read Better by Atul Gawande. I really liked this book and recommend it to anyone who wants to be a doctor, or really, just anyone (but especially if you wanna be a doctor!). It addressed performance in a field where lives are on the line and every decision carries a considerable weight. The topics discussed are very interesting and well put together. Every chapter has a sort of general setting in which medicine is practiced and a different aspect of performance analysis is brought to light in each. It was thought-provoking but nothing too scientific, making it accessible for all audiences. I just really enjoyed reading it and I'm hoping to read his other book, Complications, sometime soon!

Now I have to get started on the dance for next Saturday..

Noise, noise go away

Did we fit this many people in my house?

Ah, things are hectic. Way too hectic for my taste. I am busier than I've been in a long time (maybe even more than I've ever been!) and it's overwhelming. I don't know how my parents are able to keep their composure and energy up. I come home from work, mentally drained from the boredom. My eyes are seriously glazed over as I walk from the hospital doors to my car, and even along the hour drive home. I look out but I don't really see anything, I don't focus in on anything.

I come home and then I help out in the kitchen, preparing for dinner. Then I help serve the three families that dine together. And then I eat within 5-10 minutes and start cleaning the kitchen. By the time the kitchen work is done, it's like an hour to an hour and half before I should go to bed. Should being the operative word there (in case the italics didn't do it for you) And then I finally sit down on my bed, waste a bunch of time on my laptop, sleep way too late and then wake up groggy. The working life sucks!

Which is why I can't wait to get back to my familiar routine of studying! I am seriously so bored by the life I live right now. I get alone time at all the wrong times and when I want the peace and quiet more than anything, I'm surrounded by a horde of kids. It is ridiculous!

Oh and I haven't played tennis in over a week now. I don't know if I'll be able to play anytime soon since there's always so much to do around the house (and my Jimminy Cricket LOVES to work overtime!) I need to figure out a new workout schedule. I don't even wanna bother trying to use the on demand videos I get because I know every single person in the house will just sit there, observing me as I (try to) contort my body into whatever shape the shapely pilates instructor effortlessly adapts. Privacy is a lot to ask for these days.

I guess the bottom line is:
Anuja, where are you?

Pomp and Circumstance

Today was my sister's high school graduation! I was a little late because I went there straight from work so I missed some of the beginning stuff (guess I lucked out hehe) but I made it in time for all the important stuff. Yup that's right, I heard them announce all four hundred and some graduates, of which I knew...three. Either way it was interesting because I actually missed my high school graduation. We left for India the day after my prom so I wasn't here for graduation. I guess that made this a little more special for me, because since it's the same school and a lot of the same teachers, I felt like I was graduating! I saw a bunch of teachers I've been meaning to visit so that was nice!

After the graduation we came home and had a really hectic dinner (I don't know when dinner won't be hectic now that we have 15 people eating together!). One thing I'm not a huge fan of is how noisy the house is. There are always a lot of people in the house and they are always making noise! I miss the quiet and the solitude. I am really appreciating the alone time I get when I drive to and from work. I miss having time to myself, to collect my thoughts and just daydream. Even now, as I type this, I can hear every word that is being shouted downstairs and I just wish I could go somewhere more isolated at night. Ah, well it's only a few months..

Tomorrow morning I am going to sign my lease for my apartment for med school...I think the changes that are going on in my life are a lot more realized when there is tangible evidence attached to them..Signing the lease tomorrow will really drive home the fact that I will no longer be driving home after August. It's so weird to think that I'm moving out again and that this time, home won't be my bi-weekly (or whatever the word for every two weeks is) retreat. I'll have to stay at school more because of the exams and studying. It's gonna be different, that's for sure..

I know most of this post seems like I'm not happy with where I am. That's not the case. I just have some adjusting to do. Things at home are different and pretty soon, my home itself will be different. It's just a lot to grasp and having work all day doesn't leave much time for grasping. Ah, I'll get it by the time I have to leave in August. Okay I am so tired now so off to bed!

We are Family

Life has changed drastically since my last post! My relatives from India arrived yesterday and all of a sudden my life just seems completely different. There's nothing by way of events or happenings to share so I will stick to what there is an abundance of--thoughts and feelings..

I have never really known what it is like to have extended family. Don't mistake what I mean...I have a HUGE family (I am Indian, after all!) but until yesterday, my mom's entire family was in India. My dad's family isn't the really close-knit type so even though I see them every month or at least every few months, it doesn't quite have the same feel as...My Big Fat Greek Wedding. But I have no doubts that this has all changed.

I always found it interesting that there is any closeness at all between me and my siblings (in one category) and my cousins. The first time we met them was in 2005, when we went for a family wedding and my brother's janoi (sacred thread ceremony for brahmins). It amazed me how the SECOND we stepped foot into the airport, they were filled with awe and respect and adoration for us. I really don't know why. They had never met us..they had only ever talked on the phone and even that, it was just small talk. Yet, somehow, they loved us before they even knew us. You could see in their eyes how curious and amazed they were by us, by our lifestyle, but most of all, by our relation to them. They had older cousins that held a special position in their lives. A position that I never even knew about! And what surprised me even more was that I felt all of those things as well! I had been filling that position more than adequately all of my life, and I never even knew it!


The bond between family members is something that science has tried to decipher and unsurprisingly, was unable to. There's something special about kin that is beyond the particles that compose us. There is a special connection that transcends anything that can be measured, or even observed. I don't understand it, but I do not doubt that it's there.

I know things will be tough with so many people living in a single house. Egos are bound to clash and there are going to be some compromises for everyone. But I think ultimately, the fact that we are family will keep us together. I am going to try to be extremely patient with everyone and I will try my best to help them adapt. I know this is my lesson in patience and trust me, I am going to take very good notes!

Okay so enough of my thoughts...I don't really have much else to write about. I have been going to work and playing tennis and helping with dance/drama practices. That's about it. I am happy and I guess that's the whole point isn't it?

I'm Vicariously REALLY lucky!

So I have finished Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!! And I want more! I am going to get the next book in the series from the library so I can continue the story. It's a really quick and easy read and very amusing. There are some parts that actually made me not just smile, but laugh out loud! I just wish I didn't wait so long to pick it up!


In other news...as always I went on Colbert Nation this morning and clicked on the tickets tab. I know it's kinda impossible to get tickets, but I still have hope. THERE WERE TICKETS AVAILABLE TODAY! For two different days!!! Except those days are during the first week of medical school!! I was so disappointed! I was SO close to being able to see the taping of the colbert report! I guess the good news is that I was able to get one of my close friends to get on the site before they were taken and he got the tickets! So at least I get to go vicariously =D

Speaking of Colbert, I LOVED the episodes in Iraq! I thought the haircut was a nice touch and it really showed his support for the troops. It's so great that he went there to entertain them and make them laugh. They need it and deserve it! I love that he was able to show his feelings on the war and yet still support the troops wholeheartedly. Man, what an awesome guy! And when he showed that picture of himself wrapped in the American flag...mmmmm ;)

There is A LOT going on in life right now. That's mainly the reason I haven't been able to post as consistently as I keep promising to! Remember the family from India that I was talking about? Well, they're coming on Wednesday!!! That leaves 3 days to cram in whatever other preparations there are left to do! We spent the day cleaning out the basement and the garage today. It was a LONG task but it definitely feels good to be done with it! Tomorrow's project: the attic (eek!).

Yesterday I had to drive down to Rutgers Camden with my sister to take her there for her placement exams. It took up most of the day, especially cuz we hit traffic on the way back. I parked in this lot but I didn't know if it was allowed without a permit. And I didn't want to get my car towed (at my expense of course) so I decided to sit in the car for the 3 hours. Um yeah, okay so much for that! I had to go to the bathroom an hour in and I gave up and just left the car. Luckily, parking was allowed during weekends without a permit and the day didn't turn into an entry on FML =)

Work has been going pretty well. There's not too much to do so it's not all that hectic. But there is something to do everyday since it's a hospital-affiliated practice. It gets boring sometimes, but that's why I bring a book! One of the people I work with is very amusing too. She can talk A LOT about nearly any topic so whenever I'm bored, I just say a word to get her started. It works out really nicely!

I am also busy preparing for Dada's visit this year. (For those who don't know, I have a Guru who lives in India and comes to visit every summer for about 3 weeks. He will be arriving at the end of June and leaving in July.) I am doing a dance with my sister as well as helping out the aunties with their dance. Also, there's a bunch of one-act plays that I am helping narrate. It's fun with all these people coming over for practice. This busy schedule of practices has defined my summers for as long as I can remember and it's so comforting to be home for it all again. It's always a great time and definitely filled with lots of laughs! We are completely done with the aunty dance so that's exciting. Next up: the little girls' dance! Following that: me and my sister! It's gonna be a busy month =D

Well I think that just about sums it up..OH I started a new book. What They Didn't Teach You About the 60s. It's interesting and I'm not far enough into it to write any more haha!

Thoughts of a Working Girl

Oh man so it's been a really busy couple of days..I started work on Monday!! I work in a molecular oncopathology lab which basically means we test patients' urine samples and heme and look at other tissues for any abnormalities, aka cancer. So far I've been training to sort of learn everything that is done in the lab, basically so I can do anyone's (more like everyone's) work. I learned how to run the urine samples for FISH and I learned how to type up diagnostic reports for patients whose results have already come in. It's kinda interesting in the abstract but actually doing it = repetitiveness. The good thing is I have a couple of coworkers and they are pretty entertaining. So the days don't seem interminable. I just wish I wasn't the inferior haha..

Also, I've gone to play tennis yesterday evening after work and just before I sat down to finally post. My game is really improving and I'm SO happy with my progress! It's really frustrating not being good at something I'm "supposed" to be good at so it's refreshing to have my talent back again, even if only partially (and even if it took 4 years -_-).


In other news, I've been reading Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and it is definitely amusing. There's a lot of humor in the way it's written and so that always gives me something to smile about! I'm about 8 chapters in and I have about half an hour to read everyday so it shouldn't be long before I'm done reading it =)

Okay serious realization: I have been coming home grouchy/grumpy (Think Oscar the Grouch^Grumpy the dwarf..that's right, raise it to that power!)..I give a lot of credit to people who can drive an hour to work, sit around at work for 8 hours and then drive an hour back and still be cheerful. I'm thinking it's because it's all new to me, this routine business..but once I get used to it, hopefully I'll be less drained by the end of the day. All I know is I fall asleep willingly at 10:30 every night. It's a beautiful(?) thing.

Alright, I'm pooped. I'm gonna watch a Colbert episode and then get some sleep. More later (tomorrow hopefully!)

More of the Usual

Ahh it's been a few busy days so I haven't had much time to post. I've just been busy doing the usual house preparation stuff and landscaping stuff. One exciting thing though---yesterday was my sister's prom! I did her hair and makeup and she really looked beautiful! I was especially glad because it was my first time doing anyone's hair in a formal updo. I guess I'm a natural..but I was seriously just relieved it looked good haha!

We got two BIG rugs for the living room and formal dining room so we set those up today and also moved a bunch of furniture around. It was a hectic day but we accomplished a lot so it feels nice to be tired in a productive way. I start work on Monday so that's really gonna change up my schedule. Today I did a practice drive up with my mom cuz I'm not used to driving her SUV and also I've never been there so I wanted to see how to go since I'll be going for work on Monday. It's gonna be a smooth ride (and not just cuz of the lexus..though that does help hehe)

I've read over half of A Brief History of Time at this point and I'm really enjoying it. I love thinking about black holes and antimatter and so this book is really stimulating. I know a lot of the facts but I know through time I'll probably reread this book to the point that I have them memorized (yesss! with every day and every page I'm one step closer to being a wise old person!) I am speeding along nicely at my rate of 1.3 chapters a day! I think after this I'll switch gears and reach for a different field since I've been gravitating (haha appropriate word!) towards physics lately. I've been meaning to pick up an Atul Gawande book from the library so that may be next!

Alright well not much else to share today..time is just creeping along as I struggle to squeeze as much work and fun and responsibilities into the days. But man, I am loving summer weather right now! I hope I get to go play tennis or at least toss a football around tomorrow. Well, tata for now!

Haha this is kinda cute:

On to Hawking!

The rain just won't let up...I keep waking up to the same shade of gray, unsure of when it will downpour and when the clouds will contain themselves. Today's tennis plans are once again up in the air! I did end up playing yesterday surprisingly, so maybe today will be another one of those surprisingly pleasant days. It's really all about the timing =) After tennis last night, I made ravioli with spinach and corn for dinner along with some homemade garlic bread. It was yummy!! And I was definitely hungry after my workout! After dinner I threw around a football with my brother. It was a gorgeous night and I had a lot of fun. I love spending evenings outside!


So since I finished the Feynman book in the morning yesterday, I started The Illustrated A Brief History of Time & The Universe in a Nutshell last night. I am LOVING it. I read the first two chapters, so roughly 50 pages last night. Not much that I've read so far is news to me but every time I consider all of these ideas about space-time and the expanding universe, I get really excited. A part of me really wishes I was a physics major. I LOVE theoretical physics! I am planning on finishing this book quickly haha (Feynman only took a couple of days so hopefully this will too, it's much shorter!). I am tempted to take notes as I read; I guess you can't get the student out of me! (Good thing too, considering I am going to med school).

Today's plans are more of the usual..TV, reading, eating, playing tennis, helping out with dinner, and some more reading haha! Oh and can't forget the daily crossword! So tomorrow is my sister's prom and I am in charge of getting her ready! I'm going to curl her hair and do her makeup. I'm really excited for it! I've even figured out what purse and jewelry she should wear. Reminds me of when I went to prom..doesn't seem like it was so long ago. Man, I am getting old!

I am really enjoying this week off. I am ridiculously glad that I wasn't able to start work yet. I really needed this down time after all the studying I did and things just worked out well. I honestly don't even care about working..it's just a source of money. That's how I'm seeing it. I don't even know what I'll be doing yet but whatever...just want to save up some money, that's all!

Okay my stomach is grumbling and I need to get some food in me. More later =)

Up and Feynman

You know when it rains and it's just warm and soothing...it's one of those rains outside. It's calming and gentle and unless you look really hard you can't even tell it's raining...The only bad thing is that my tennis plans for today are interrupted. But it's okay, at least it's for a nice rain and not a mean one!


So I ended up seeing Up with my brother and sister yesterday. It was really good! It was a little more serious than what I would've expected but I think that added to it. There were some sad parts in the movie and I felt...sad. But there were definitely enough funny moments to compensate. The animation was really good and the plot was nice. There were points that I thought would be a little too scary for kids but I was able to make it through those by watching through the slits between my fingers as I covered my eyes hehe! But yeah so DEFINITELY worth seeing!! And it really made me want a balloon hahaha!

After the movie I ended up going to play tennis...it was so odd! When I walked into the theater it was pouring outside. And when I walked out, it was bright and sunny and you couldn't even tell it had rained! So weird. But I definitely took advantage of the dry weather and played tennis. It was a perfect night for it too...the air was cool and there was just the slightest breeze. There were a bunch of people at the courts so we had to wait for about half an hour for a court but it was definitely worth the wait! My game is improving with every time I go..I can't wait to play at my high school level! =)

This morning I woke up and finished the Feynman book I was reading. It was sad to finish it. But I really enjoyed it. He made my list of favorite men. (Top contenders on that list are Stephen Colbert, Thomas Friedman, Jim Henson, Paul Krugman, Bill Clinton, Jack Sparrow, Clive Owen, Bill Cosby and now Richard Feynman). But yeah so that book was entertaining and amusing and I felt so privileged to know the thoughts of someone who really 'lived'. I was just thinking of how maybe I knew more about him than some of the students he had taught and how weird that is. Definitely read it!

I spent some time doing a crossword and watching TV. Now I'm off to play tennis. More later =)

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Summer

It's definitely summer. I spent most of yesterday working outside--mowing the lawn, watering the vegetable garden, planting a bunch of trees. There's nothing more 'summer' than dirt under my fingernails, grass blades in my hair, and some light brown icing on all of my already brown skin. Let's just not think about the mosquito bites!

I have this comfortable ache in all of my appendages and my lower back..and a blister on my hand. I also managed to finish cleaning my room, yayy! Oh and what's sad is that I'm getting so close to the end of the Feynman book. I am really not happy about almost being done with it..it's been an excellent companion for the last few moments of my day, just before I drift off.

The most exciting things that came from me unpacking my stuff is: 1.) Speakers! (my laptop speakers haven't worked since...a while..but now I've set up my speakers!), 2.) My husband pillow thing that makes reading SO much better, 3.) King Julian masks that I promptly turned over to my brother and sister (my delivery was excellent, complete with the fake accent and dancing), 4.) Boo Bear! (self-explanatory), 5.) Turtle! (not so self-explanatory...it's a stuffed animal duck)


So today my plans are to relax! I haven't really gotten much relaxing in since I've been home but that'll change today. I plan on watching reruns of all those corny shows--Full House, Sister Sister, Saved by the Bell, and of course Arthur! And then I'm going to see either Angels and Demons or Up with my brother and sister after they get home from school. I am super excited about this! The movie we watch depends on what time they can get home. And after that, I'll either do some more gardening or I'll go play tennis..we'll see which way the wind blows me.


Oh so let me update you on my outdoor projects since a lot of my time is devoted to them: We have nearly an acre of land and well mowing that is definitely a task. So I've decided to help my dad out with the mowing since I'll be home all summer (and since my brother is especially lazy about that). Also, we are growing eggplant, cucumbers, okra, peas, tomatoes, and peppers in the backyard. So I am in charge of watering the plants twice a day. So my backyard is sort of shaped like half a baseball diamond (a triangle, in simpler terms)...the far end is home plate and it gets wider as it approaches the house (which is the pitcher's mound). Along the stretch from third base to home plate we want to plant a row of trees. Mind you this is not to scale so really we are planting a LOT of trees. Also, it slopes upward a little bit as it approaches the back point so it's a little harder than it sounds. We planted like 8 trees or so yesterday and my parents had already planted 2-3 before I came home. We're making some progress! Another task we have is to lay out weed-blocker (the black sheets) in our front landscaping and then cover that with stones. The stones are kind of pretty so it looks nice. We have a huge pile of stones sitting on the driveway and with every wheelbarrow-full of stones that is transported to the front of the house, I see a little shimmer of hope that we're almost done. We did finish about half of the weedblocking/stone transport so now we should be done within a week or two maximum. Okay I think that's it haha!

Alright time to get a work out in before my day turns into a tv/movie marathon. Yay so excited! =D

Friendship

Friendship is something that always amazes me when I stop to think about it. It's one of the most beautiful things this world has to offer and I am seriously at a loss for words when I try to describe how much beauty it possesses (and yet I will type paragraphs, trying to show you how I perceive it).

Until recently, I always thought a real friendship is the only kind that is worthy. I always knew that there are different levels of friendships but what I didn't realize was that it's okay for there to be those different levels. I struggled with my 'fake' friendships, trying to validate them somehow.

But recently, I discovered that every level of friendship has it's place in my life and without every single one of them, I wouldn't be exactly who I am today. I have learned a great deal about life through my friendships and without these lessons shaping me along the way, I don't even know how far back I would be.

I think leaving Philly today made me realize exactly what I am leaving behind. I realized that I won't be within 5 minutes of my friends anymore, that keeping these friendships strong will require some effort. I know that my friends will never be too far from me, as long as I nurture the friendships. I don't usually have trouble with that sort of thing but it will definitely be a task with medical school next year. I was already having some trouble balancing it this year, I can only imagine how hard it will get in the future.

Friendship is something that just makes sense to me. I am not the type of person to be a 'fake' friend and at every stage of my life, I have added on a few deeply-rooted friendships that will probably sustain me for the entire journey. I am grateful to these friends and I am looking forward to the memories we will share.

Moving Day!

BUSY DAY! I squeezed a year of my life into 2 cars and drove it home..the cars were jam packed! I don't know how we did it...I still can't believe it. And to motivate myself to unpack everything before August, I put it all in my room. I don't know of a plan that has backfired with more drastic consequence--there is barely any space to walk right now! I did clean for at least an hour and half but there is just SO MUCH to sort through. Haha whatever..I did manage to bake some brownies in between so I'm happy (and so is my dad haha) Oh and I discovered that silken tofu is a great egg replacer--at least for brownies =)

So driving home from Philly was a little sad at first. Watching the skyline grow smaller and smaller and eventually disappear from the side view mirror was definitely an emotional experience. All I needed to top it off was a montage of my Philly memories with Good Riddance or Here's to the Nights playing in the background. That really would've triggered the waterworks!

Moving out was alright but after I got home we cut up some nice cold mangoes and mann they were SO sweet and juicy! It was a beautiful thing, really. Oh and I watered our vegetable garden as well as the new trees that my parents recently planted. We bought 5 more today and I think we're getting 3 more tomorrow...and then planting all 8 tomorrow afternoon! It's gonna be nice though cuz the weather has been cooperating lately..I think I'll watch some reruns during the day and maybe finish cleaning up the room before gardening..

I was looking forward to making up Colbert episodes but apparently he took Memorial week off..so much for that! I guess I'll just do a crossword and maybe get to bed early tonight. I am exhausted after all that moving out anyway. Good night!